How to Pause and Reconnect Amid Wedding Planning: The Rise of the Earlymoon
- Lynea D'Aprix
- Jul 31
- 6 min read
Wedding planning is beautiful. It’s exciting. It’s full of Pinterest boards and dress try-ons and moments that make you tear up out of nowhere.
It can also be... a lot.
At some point, even the most enthusiastic couples hit a wall. Between budget meetings, family opinions, RSVPs, timeline stress, and endless decisions, it’s easy to feel like your engagement has become more of a project than a celebration. The joy can start to feel buried under spreadsheets and vendor calls.
And that’s where the earlymoon comes in.
An earlymoon is a pre-wedding getaway: a mini honeymoon before the big day. It’s not a new trend, but it’s growing fast in 2025 as couples search for ways to reconnect, breathe, and remember what this season is all about: the two of you.
So let’s talk about what earlymoons are, why they matter, and how to make yours meaningful (even if you’re on a budget or short on time).
The Emotional Burnout of Wedding Planning
When you first get engaged, everything feels electric. You’re dreaming big, calling family, popping champagne. But slowly, the glow gets dimmed by group texts, Google Docs, and family group chats that somehow always circle back to napkin colors. What started as a season of celebration can quietly morph into a full-time job.... with pressure, spreadsheets, and opinions coming from every direction.
It’s a lot to carry.
Many couples don’t realize how disconnected they feel until they’re in the thick of it, feeling like roommates with to-do lists instead of engaged partners in love.
That disconnection can show up in small ways:
Constantly talking about the wedding but not about each other
Feeling like you’re on different pages or timelines
Snapping at each other over small things
Losing sight of why you’re getting married in the first place
An earlymoon is a powerful way to pause, reconnect, and create space for joy in the middle of the whirlwind.
What Is an Earlymoon, Exactly?
An earlymoon is a trip you take before your wedding, usually a few months or weeks out. Unlike a traditional honeymoon (which comes after the wedding), an earlymoon is designed to:
Help you rest and reset
Deepen your emotional connection
Step away from wedding stress
Celebrate your engagement as its own chapter
It doesn’t have to be luxurious or long. Think: a weekend cabin stay, a road trip to a new town, a beach day with no phones, or even a staycation where you act like tourists in your own city.
It’s not about the location. It’s about the intention.
They’re a moment of breath in an otherwise tightly packed season. They give you permission to be fiancés again instead of project managers.
What an Earlymoon Is Not
Let’s clear something up. An earlymoon is not:
An excuse to avoid planning
A sign that something is wrong
A luxury only for couples with unlimited funds
A replacement for your honeymoon (unless you want it to be!)
It’s simply a way to put each other first.
Signs You Might Need an Earlymoon
Sometimes, it creeps up slowly. Other times, it hits all at once. You’re knee-deep in planning and suddenly realize you haven’t had a real, uninterrupted conversation with your partner in weeks that wasn’t about table layouts or whether Aunt Joan should sit with the cousins or the college friends.
If you’re wondering whether an earlymoon is “extra” or necessary, here are a few signs that it might be exactly what you need:
You’ve said “I miss you” to your partner… even though you see each other every day.
You’re physically in the same room, but emotionally you feel like ships passing in the night. Conversations are quick, transactional, and usually about deadlines. You’re craving deeper connection, not just shared logistics.
Wedding talk dominates every single conversation.
From vendor emails over dinner to late-night Pinterest scrolling in bed, your entire engagement feels like it’s revolving around one event. You realize you’re not just planning a wedding, you’re living inside it. And it’s taking up all the space.
You both feel emotionally tapped out.
The weight of decisions, expectations, and to-do lists has built up. One of you is short-tempered, the other is checked out. You're still a team, but the spark feels dim, and the joy feels distant.
You’re overwhelmed and finding it hard to stay present.
You keep checking off boxes, but it feels like you’re floating through it all instead of living it. You're attending vendor meetings but forgetting what was said. You’re counting down the days, but not savoring the moments in between.
You’re having fun less often.
The little rituals you used to love (spontaneous date nights, morning coffee chats, laughing at dumb memes together) have taken a back seat to timelines and budget spreadsheets. Everything feels like a task. And fun feels like something you’ll get after the wedding.
If any of this sounds familiar, it doesn’t mean something is wrong. It just means you’re human. Planning a wedding is a huge undertaking, and it’s okay to need a break from the “wedding version” of yourselves. Sometimes, the best way to reconnect with your vision for the future is to pause in the now.
How to Plan a Meaningful Earlymoon (on Any Budget)
Here are some steps to make your earlymoon intentional, fun, and stress-free:
1. Set the Intention
Before you choose a location or date, get clear on why you want this time away.
Is it to reconnect emotionally?
To rest and unplug?
To celebrate a major milestone?
Let that be your guide.
2. Agree on the Rules
Decide together what the earlymoon is and is not.
Will you talk about the wedding at all?
Are phones allowed?
Is this an adventure trip or a full chill mode?
There’s no wrong answer, just make sure you’re on the same page.
3. Choose a Location That Feels Easy
You don’t need to fly across the world. Think:
Cozy Airbnb in the mountains
Spa resort an hour away
A cabin by a lake
Your own home, turned into a sanctuary for the weekend
It’s less about distance, more about disruption. You want to feel out of the wedding zone.
4. Plan One Intentional Activity
Make space for one thing that helps you bond:
Re-read your engagement story together
Write a letter to each other to open the night before the wedding
Take a silly photo shoot or video diary
Try something new like kayaking, dancing, or cooking a fancy meal together
That one activity will become an anchor memory from this time in your relationship.
5. Keep It Low Pressure
This isn’t a Pinterest moment. It’s a real-life breath. Don’t over-plan it. Don’t make it a production. The point is to feel like yourselves again.
Real Couple Inspiration: The Earlymoon That Changed Their Planning
“We were six months into planning, and I was starting to hate the wedding,” a bride told me during a recent consultation with a long, drawn out sigh. She felt isolated, burnt out, and like the excitement had been replaced by pressure.
I gently reminded her, as I often do with my clients, that planning a wedding is essentially a second job layered on top of your regular life. You’re suddenly devoting hours each week to timelines, budgets, and decision-making... not to mention navigating emotions and expectations. Even if you love the process, anything that requires that much time and energy can start to feel heavy. Feeling spent isn’t a sign you’re doing it wrong.
"Everything felt like a decision I had to make. My partner suggested we go away for a weekend, and I rolled my eyes at first, but we found a tiny lake cabin, brought a pile of our favorite snacks, and did nothing for two days. We got excited about the wedding again. That trip saved our joy. We got more planning done when we got back than we had gotten done in weeks." ~ Mary, a teacher from Pennsylvania who shared her story with me about taking an earlymoon.
You don’t need a big reason to take a small break. Sometimes the break becomes the reason you fall back in love with the process.
If You Can't Travel, Here's What to Do Instead
Not every couple can travel, and that’s okay. You can create an earlymoon energy at home:
Declare an "engagement weekend" with no wedding talk
Cook a fancy dinner together with candles, playlists, and your favorite dessert
Build a fort in your living room and watch movies from your childhood
Spend a day offline and just go wherever the day takes you
Write your vows early, and read them privately to each other
Connection isn’t about the setting. It’s about the intention.
A Reminder You Might Need
Your wedding day is just one chapter. Your relationship is the story.
The most powerful thing you can do during planning isn’t choosing the right napkin color or hair style, it’s choosing each other, again and again.
When you pause to reconnect, you build more than a timeline. You build a marriage.
Your Earlymoon Starts with a Choice
So ask yourself:
If we could push pause on the planning for just one weekend... what would we do together?
Then go do it.
This is your permission to press pause, take a breath, and let joy catch up with you.
Tell me: What would your ideal earlymoon look like? Are you planning one? Leave a comment or email me at theweddingtalkllc@gmail.com. I’d love to hear how you’re finding connection in the chaos.
Love ya so much, Happy Planning!
Lynea
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